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Not Just Another Customer July 19, 2008

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Karen Mallinger
Negaunee, MI
www.allgoodegifts.com

In business, there are some customers who just seem to leave a lasting impression. Ira Gollobin was one of those people.

I first “met” Ira several years ago when he phoned my business. I’m an herbalist, and he was looking for something natural to help with some heart issues. From the very first word, I kept referring to him as “Mr. Gollobin,” as something in his voice just seemed to warrant that level of respect. We talked a little while and I explained to him the traditionally accepted properties of hawthorn and some other herbs that might help him. Always the learner, Mr. Gollobin questioned me about the herbs, how long I’d been in business, what went into the making of an herbal tincture, and all manner of things herbal.

After over an hour of conversation, he asked me the price. When I told him, he chuckled and said, “Karen, you’ll never become a millionaire that way!” I responded, “Well, Mr. Gollobin, that’s not really why I’m doing this. I’m doing it to educate people in alternative ways to stay healthy.” There was a short pause, a soft chuckle, and he said, “Karen, you’re wonderful.”

I didn’t hear from him much after that, but stayed current on his condition via one of the best gifts he gave me — a relationship with his lovely daughter Ruth. Every time we spoke, I asked about her father, and she would give me the latest reports. My life is much richer for having experienced Ira Gollobin, if only for a short time. And the world is a little less wonderful without him in it. Godspeed, Mr. Gollobin.

Remembering Ira July 19, 2008

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Susan Gebel (daughter Ruth’s longtime friend)
Brooklyn, NY

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I remember Ira as a kind yet very strong person. He was not a big man, but there was conviction in his gaze. He had a knowing look about him and he made you feel that he really cared about you. He didn’t always say that much when there were family gatherings at his daughter Ruth’s house, but if you were to have a conversation with him, you had to be on your toes because he was so knowledgeable! Ira wanted to know how things were going with you and really took an interest in you. What I remember most about Ira were his hugs. He may have been wiry and thin, but he gave the best and strongest hugs I’ve ever had. Ira, you will be missed!

A chance meeting at the grocery store… a lifelong friendship July 19, 2008

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Birgitte Spoorendonk
Vamdrup, Denmark

Dear Friends of Ruth,

According to Ira, I must have meant something to Ruth at a time when she had difficulties with her life. I did not do much but I happened to be at the right place at the right moment. We met at the grocery store. She was looking for sauerkraut. This is not a common dish in Denmark so I told her to look in a shop for specialties. We had a little chat, but I felt she needed a bit of comfort, so I asked her to come and see me, which she did. She met my dear husband, children, and their fiancés. When my daughter married, Ruth was going to attend, but she took a train and didn’t find the church. So she came to our home bringing a gift: six small glasses of her own, probably from Poland or the U.S.

In the meantime Ruth lost her mother and her husband left her. She had some Greek and Danish friends who were involved in Greek politics. She had to move several times. Even if her belongings were few, I remember once when my husband was helping her, he complained about her many books. I remember taking her to Hamlet’s castle in Kronborg with a group of Danes. (I was a guide back then.)

Ruth returned to New York. In 1980 my girlfriend Agnes and I made a trip to America. We were supposed to meet Ruth at LaGuardia Airport. We waited and waited; but finally I had to call. “Oh dear, didn’t you get my message?” Ruth had bought a couch for our arrival but it could be delivered only at the same time as we were arriving. She had called the airport and asked the information desk to tell us to take a bus. I had paid no attention to the loudspeaker since they are so difficult to understand. It was quite late when we arrived at Ruth’s flat. “What would you like to eat?” she said. “Well, what have you got?” “I am going to get something,” was the answer. “Now? At this time of day (10 pm)?” “Birgitte, you are in America!” Ruth declared. In Denmark, shop hours were from 8 am until 5:30 pm and Saturdays to 2 pm. Other hours were unthinkable.

Ruth was a good host. She took us by hand around Manhattan, and to the Empire State Building where she worked, and one day we toured with her friend Paula Gronska. She enjoyed having us and wanted to show us that she could manage her life again.

My beloved husband passed away February 17, 2007, exactly a year before Ruth. I wish those attending the memorial a meaningful day.

John David, Manila, 1946 July 19, 2008

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Erwin Marquit

Minneapolis, Minnesota

As members of the U.S. émigré/deportee community, Ruth and I were good friends in Poland from the time of her arrival until I returned to the U.S. in 1963. My wife and I were in  contact with her during my sabbatical in Copenhagen in 1971/72. Ruth would often take care of our teenage children when we traveled without them. I then met her occasionally in New York at the annual Socialist Scholar’s conferences.

I first met Ira in June 2000, when I interviewed him in connection with a history I was writing about the G. I. demobilization demonstrations in January 1946. He was one of the principal organizers of the demonstrations in Manilla (I had taken part in the demonstrations in Hawaii).

If I were able to attend the memorial, I would recount one rather surprising exchange with him, considering his age at the time of the interview. At the end of the interview, he asked me, “Who are you going cite as the source of this information?” “You, of course,” I replied. “Oh, no!” he said, "I’m still practicing.” 

When I published the history in the journal Nature, Society, and Thought (Vol. 15, no. 1 [2002], pp. 5-39), I referred to him only with the pseudonym “John David,” explaining in a note that he did not want to be identified by his real name. Hero to me that he remains, I assume there will be no objection to my publishing an “update” note giving his true name so he can have full credit for his contribution to the demonstrations.

Let Aaron be gathered to his kin… July 19, 2008

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Josh Lipschutz
Bala Cynwyd, PA

Sitting in Shul two weeks ago with my parents, Mike and Linda Lipschutz, my wife Lisa and our three children, Hannah, Benjamin, and, as of one month ago, Jacob, I was inspired by a passage. I hadn’t planned on saying anything today, content to let my mom, Ira’s niece, the daughter of Ira’s sister Beatrice, represent the family; however, I think this is worth telling.

The section of the Bible we were reading two weeks ago was Hukkat, and there were several notable deaths in that chapter, including Miriam, Moses’s sister, and Aaron, the high priest and Moses’s brother. As it is written in Numbers 20:24, when the Israelites reached Mount Hor, which was next to the Promised Land, which neither Moses nor Aaron were going to be allowed to enter, G-d said to Moses and Aaron, “Yaasafe Aaron el-Amo”. The Hebrew is translated as, “Let Aaron be gathered to his kin…” The commentary in the Etz Hayim Chumush interprets this as “Let his good qualities now enter the souls of those living who knew him, that those qualities not be lost after his death.” And I think that’s what we are doing here today. We are letting the good qualities of Ira and Ruth now enter the souls of those who knew them, that these qualities not be lost even after their deaths.

And what are those qualities? I’ll mention a few that stand out for me. I remember Ruth as a woman who loved the world. It has been said that anybody who is not a Communist at age 18 doesn’t have a heart. Ruth had a great heart and, I believe, remained a Communist, in the best sense of the word, long after age 18. I remember telling her after 9/11, that I was joining the army, and her getting very upset and crying. Even though I was joining as a doctor, she hated the concept of armies and war. The world needs people like her.

And Ira, ah, so many good qualities. To mention a few, he was a brilliant thinker and the father of a new field of law, Immigration Law, which I’m sure others, who are expert in this area, will tell you more about. Ira was also a dedicated family man and always kept in close contact with the exiled Indiana branch of my family. Though advanced in years and somewhat frail, Ira and Ruth made the trek to San Francisco for my wedding in December of 2000.

Interestingly, sometimes public and private worlds collide. At our wedding, my wife’s Aunt, Barbara Hines, who is a Professor of Immigration Law at UT Austin, met Ira and remarked that it was like meeting a legend. So to paraphrase that greatest of books, the Bible, “Yaasafe Ira Varut el-Amo.” Let Ira and Ruth be gathered to their kin.

Soft and Gentle July 19, 2008

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Genevieve and Ken Knoblauch and Family, Lyon, France

We will always remember Ruth as someone very soft and gentle, yet with strong opinions.

Recollections of Ruth July 19, 2008

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Barry Clayton, London, England

I first met Ruth in the ‘60s in Warsaw. The crisscrossing jumble of our lives brought us together in adjacent offices in the English Section of Polish Radio. She had arrived in Poland from the McCarthyism which was America from the mid-‘50s onwards: “Are you now — or have you ever been….?” I was an actor who wanted to be a film director. Working in radio was a stepping stone — or at least so I hoped. Ruth seemed a rather somber woman who had lived through a lot in America. Finding sanctuary in Poland was not easy for her. She found the local language difficult to get to grips with and some of the customs seemed strange to her. As a left-wing American she had not expected the Catholic Church to have such power and influence in what was supposed to be a communist country. Ruth’s own family had been forced to leave Poland during the czarist pogroms. Whilst she seemed to appreciate the irony of her returning to Eastern Europe, her situation made her somewhat prickly. I think she was haunted by ghosts from her own family’s past and memories of the victims of fascism in Poland during the Second World War. Even though a stranger in a strange land, she decided to make of her situation the best she could. And to a certain extent she succeeded.

Toward the end of the ‘60s, with many other Jewish people who were forced to leave the country, Ruth became another victim — this time of Polish anti-Semitism. Old myths, fears, and hatreds die hard, now as then.

Ruth spent a few years in Denmark. Then the opportunity arose for her to return to the United States, where she met Ira. With him she found the happiness she had always sought … though as usual it was a rather muted happiness, but very real. I’m sure we will all remember her with great warmth.

Ira Was a Profoundly Decent Person July 19, 2008

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Tamara Thompson, Maplewood, NJ

tammi-ira Ira signed my copy of Dialectical Materialism “To Tammi, with affection and esteem — and hope!” I think part of the hope he referred to was that I would one day finish reading The Book. In defense of my very slow progress, I have reasoned that if it took Ira over thirty years to write it, it will take me a while to read, understand, and absorb it.

I have started it, and even met with him several times to discuss what I had read, but to my regret did not finish it before he died.

He would often ask about my progress in reading The Book. I’m convinced that he kept asking not just because he was the author, but because he believed in what he wrote — to his very core. For him it was not just a book or a way of thinking but a way of living. When faced with prostate cancer or a broken ankle, he frequently mentioned how applying the principles laid out in The Book helped him to overcome both conditions and to achieve so much more.

While Ira’s achievements were monumental, they weren’t the reason I rushed to the hospital to see him when I heard he wasn’t expected to live through the night. I didn’t love Ira because he had won two Supreme Court cases. I loved him because he was a profoundly decent person who cared for others and consistently showed it. It sounds trite, almost insignificant, but Ira was a man of his word. He said what he meant and meant what he said. He kept his promises.

I humbly assert that what defined Ira was absolute congruency. What Ira believed, he lived; what he said, he did (except for his promise to live to 100, which I’m trying not to hold against him). No substitutes; no shortcuts. Though not a religious person, Ira had profound faith — in people and their ability and responsibility to make the world a better place. He lived his life doing just that — making the world better, more just, more compassionate; a place of welcome and sustenance for all, not just a few.

In Ira we’ve lost not only a father, friend, and advocate; we’ve lost a national treasure. I believe that Ira’s hope was that in finishing The Book, I would live a more congruent life as well, a life that makes sense in and of this world; a life better equipped to wage true justice and to pick up the struggle where he left off. Here’s to Ira, The Book, and living a life of utter integrity!

I was at the gym… he had just turned 89 July 19, 2008

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Ellen Giglio, New York, NY

The first thing that I said to my husband when he told me that he had landed a new job as a Cantor was, “Ira would have been so proud of you!” Ira was aware of how much my husband struggled, in his 50’s, going back to school and trying to create a new life for himself. Ira was also very supportive of ME! He said he knew what I must be going through, with my daughter, Lina (12), my special needs son, Aaron (9), working long hours, supporting my family financially, seeing Arthur through this huge undertaking, and having basically no time for myself.

Ira cheered me on through the last 6 years, every step of the way, and literally gave me strength to continue on this new journey for my family. He talked to me about marriage and what that means, and he assured me that I was completely upholding my end of the bargain (as he said, “for better or for worse”). He also assured me that once we were through all our craziness, there would be a light at the end of the tunnel for me and my family. It looks like he was able to see what was coming for us. He was a light in my life, and I know so many people feel that way, too.

I have many fond memories of Ira, but my favorite, which is the first time I met him, was because he totally blew me away!

When Ira was sent to me for bodywork (deep tissue massage work, lymphatic drainage, shiatsu, trigger point therapy and foot reflexology are my main venues), I was told that he was in his “early 80’s,” and that he had some swelling in his ankles. I had no idea what else to expect with that little bit of information.

When Ira arrived, there was a smiling, energetic, yet to-the-point person, entering my office. I thought to myself, “This man looks like he’s in his 60’s, not his early 80’s,” and I then proceeded to take a medical history. The history only took about 10 minutes! I have clients in their 30’s, 40’s, and 50’s telling me all their physical, emotional, and medical problems, showing up with CAT scans, MRI results, long lists of medications, and many other interesting things that young people shouldn’t be facing just yet. So I asked, “Are you sure that’s all you have to tell me?” and Ira said, “Well, what else do you want to know?” “Okay then, why don’t we get started?”

Our session began with work on Ira’s feet. He asked me about each and every thing I was doing. “What’s that point pertain to?” “Oh, that’s sensitive, what does that mean?” “That doesn’t hurt at all, is that good?” And many more questions! When I began to work on the rest of his body, he said, “Now, don’t feel that you have to go easy on me, I can take a lot … no pain, no gain.” I laughed and said, “Well, let’s just work our way in slowly and see how it goes.”

When I began to work more deeply on his shoulders, which were often tight from all that reading he did, suddenly, out of nowhere, Ira began to recite complete Shakespearean sonnets, right there on the table!!! Instantly, I thought “Wow, if I weren’t married!” and I listened with awe. As Ira was about to leave, he turned to me and asked, “Tell me, am I your oldest client?” When I informed him that I had a client who was 92, Ira said, “Oh darn, she has me beat by 3 years.” I nearly fell over. That would mean he was 89 years old!!!! I said to him, “You are NOT 89! I thought you were way younger than that!” So Ira pulled out his ID to show me that he was being totally truthful.

Our first meeting left a huge impression on me, and in following years, Ira ended up being one of the most inspirational people in my life. I have looked up to him with great respect and his thirst for knowledge was exceptional.

Ira brought his wife, Ruth, to see me about a year later for her aches and pains. She was fascinating as well and talked about many things when she was being treated on the table. While seeing her out after her session, she met my babysitter, who is Polish. In an instant, Ruth and Anna were chatting away in Polish, and I looked from one to the other, wondering what they might be saying! In later sessions with Ruth, she explained to me that she had lived in Poland for about 7 years, and just “picked up the language.” I thought, “How on earth do you just pick up a language, especially Polish, which is certainly not an easy language to learn?” I was quite amazed by Ruth’s warm qualities and eagerness to discuss anything and everything, with fervor.

I feel blessed that these two people came into my life and lifted my spirits, simply by being who they were. I feel very, very lucky to have had them in my life, and I am honored to be attending this memorial.

My Uncle Ira July 19, 2008

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Hara Ann Bouganim Alexandria, VA

(daughter of Beatrice Gollobin Lowenthal & Milton Lowenthal)

My uncle Ira taught me values, by example.

JUSTICE: One family story is of Ira at three in a corner, saying “Ira bad boy.” Nobody knew why. He knew what was right, as he proved his whole life in his immigration work.

Ira & HaraBW-1LOVE: Memories of Ira hugging and dancing with Esther in the kitchen at Rockaway in the ‘50s. Much later, we all marveled at his and Ruth’s poetic vows when they wed.

LOYALTY: On Ira’s visit to me in 1995, after my losses and gall bladder operation, he made me feel protected. Then, in 1997, Ira flew to Indiana to spend hours with his sister Bea on her last day; such a gift to her. Finally, in summer 2007 he and Ruth came to Indiana for Mike’s [Lipschutz] retirement, not an easy trip.

HEALTH: Ira told me I’d have health and long life when I desired food that was good for my body, advice he lived by. Another family story tells of Ira waylaid by blackberries on bike trips with his brother Bill in the ‘30’s. Into his eighties and nineties, he’d hug so strongly he’d pick me up, saying that’s why he worked out, to hug … and carry a suitcase, and he did.

While Ira could never convince me of the centrality of dialectical materialism, he taught me much more. He was the last of his generation in my family. I can only hope his legacy will be one of health, justice, loyalty, and love.

There was to be a memorial in honor of Ruth, but Ira died days before the service, so they’re together, appropriately so. Ruth was a wonderful “second life” partner for my Uncle Ira, sharing experiences, commitment, and love. Her life was fully experienced, with passion for justice, theater, photography, art. Her last years robbed her of options, but not of her sense of humor or dignity. She made me a stronger person, and I will miss and remember her.